Overheard

"Never deal with roosters that look like monkeys."

"Alas, it seems you can't have your meat and eat it too."

"The world is run by people who want to run the world."

"Guests sat around the hushed booths, scribbling notes to each other on index cards, like Luddites in an Internet chat room."

"Hey, I've never killed anybody with a hammer, but I love fried chicken."

"The new porn ... [is] anything people are ashamed to get a kick out of..."

Cow I: Say, you hear about this Mad Cow Disease?
Cow II: Yep.
Cow I: You worried about it?
Cow II: Nope.
Cow I: (puzzled) Why not?
Cow II: Because I'm a squirrel.

"You have made the streets of Delhi lonely."

"He eats like a paying guest at the Last Supper."