Overheard

"Dear Yafro Users, We're terribly sorry to report that the main picture hard drive crashed on us a few days ago, and it's quite possible that all pictures uploaded to Yafro [www.yafro.com] via web browser over the last month and a half may be gone. ...
We are in the process of sending the drive to a hard drive recovery service, which believe it or not will cost almost $20,000!! So believe us when we say we are doing everything we can to get the pictures back."

"Treat people as if they were what they ought to be and you help them to become what they are capable of being."

"After researching 11 'attack options,' Rand concluded that LAX was most vulnerable to attacks using bombs planted in a vehicle, a piece of luggage, or in the cargo hold of an airplane."

"One professor's wife told us that her 7-year old grandson walked in on her one day when she was just putting on her bra in the bathroom.

'Gramma!' he exclaimed with delighted surprise. 'You have boobies!'

'Yes, I do,' she replied. 'Do you know what they're for?'

Her grandson thought for a minute and then shook his head no.

'When women have babies, they produce milk,' she explained. 'That's how mothers feed their babies.'

Her grandson nodded. 'And they're nice to look at, too!' "

"We've been in the biggest beta test in history and this test is still going on: It's called Windows."

"Don't expect sympathy for your pain. This is the toughest part of leadership. You may have agonized over a firing or layoff, lost sleep, even thrown up. ... But unless you have fired Saddam Hussein, the terminated gets sympathy.

"You're invited to shop for large selection of bombs and different kinds of rockets such as surface-to-air, surface-to-surface and weaponry available at reduced price. With the following types of rockets you will be able to commit terrorist attacks, destroy buildings, electric power stations, bridges, factories and anything else that comes your mind. Most items are in stock and available for next day freight delivery in the USA.

"If you have a DVR, you can start recording the Emmys tonight at 8 p.m. but not start watching until 9, which will give you enough time to zip past the commercials without catching up to the show "live" before it ends. How do you spend that hour between 8 and 9? How about watching this morning's "Meet the Press" or last week's "Without a Trace"? I know, I know. Sedition from a former chairman of the TV academy, but this is reality, folks."

"Penis Launcher"

"A cyclone that struck the Ganges Delta Islands in Bangladesh in 1970 killed an estimated 1 million people."

"I just wish Bush would stop acting like the worst day in our lives was the best day of his."

"Look, you don't change anybody’s mind with comedy. You just reinforce what they already believe."

"Her calm concerned me, as it always does, which can be a problem for me, as she's always calm."

"What happens on the Mile, stays on the Mile."

"...bringing truth and honesty back to the White House"

"We want one America."

"I feel for those people, but I think some of their relative is still in our attic."

"DON'T TRY [INSTALLING] THIS AT ALL UNLESS YOU ARE A BLEEDING EDGE LINUX NUT CASE. Rational people will wait a few weeks until we have a nice, reliable, version..."