Overheard

"At some point you'll deliver the entire canned speech about how, as a child, you were always building forts, exploring forest trails, roasting squirrels over a fire, and so on, the classic Huck Finn sort of existence, and the only thing you'll forget to mention is that you were nearly fatally bored."

"I can drive semitrucks, fly airplanes, make websites, and speak Chinese ----but I can not (yet) figure out how to manage a Drupal site."

"What are you drawing," the teacher asks.
"I'm drawing God," she replies.
"But, dear, no one knows what God looks like," says the teacher.
"I know," she says, "That's why I'm drawing."

"One recent winter night, I was having a bad evening with a date. We were trying to make-up. She was late and I'd picked a terrible bar. It was too loud and the weather had destroyed my flowers. Instead, we made for a nearby restaurant just off of Grand Central Terminal -- ostensibly neutral territory for us both.

She went forward with her list of demands and I countered with mine. It was tense iteration back and forth in an awkward dance of pretending to listen to the other while anxiously awaiting to make your own point. The restaurant was busy, but it wasn't so busy that the couple next to us didn't take notice. Rather than ignore us in a likely fashion, after they paid the check and passed us to leave the woman, in her late 60s, leaned in and said ever so lightly, 'You two seem like such nice kids. You shouldn't try so hard.' "

"John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met."

"About Desire is not the manufacturer of the products entailed in this website and will not be held liable in case of death, dismemberment, terminal illness or any other sickness or infectious disease that is a result of neglect in care or operation of these products. In other words, don't use an electrical item in a bathtub! We hope that you practice safe sex, thank you for shopping." [NSFW]

"I'll ruin someone's day, but not their year."

"Maybe big, old media just needs to lighten up. Big, old media apparently has been too depressed lately from falling audience and advertising. Big, old media needs to get a big drink. Or big, old media needs to get laid. Something."

"Minimalism gets very little press."

"67 percent of the women and 85 percent of the men in Montana's prisons are there because of meth-related crimes."

"When did Mother's Day also become Tech Support Day?"

"I'm a detective and expecting me to run criminals down and then let them go free is like asking a dog to catch a rabbit and then let it go. It can be done, all right, and sometimes it is done, but it's not the natural thing."

"Most combat vets pick their fights carefully. They look at their scars, remember the madness and are always mindful of the fallout. That's not the case in Washington, where the White House and the Pentagon are run by civilians who have never sweated it out on a battlefield."

"We see the dimming is no longer there,"

"Midlife means that you become more reflective... You start pondering the "big" questions. What is life? Why am I here? How much Healthy Choice ice cream can I eat before it's no longer a healthy choice?"

"Never As Good As the First Tim"

"I don't trust anyone."