A New Career Opportunity
posted at 11:01 am
on Sep. 1, 2001
Previous entry:
Looking for Advice about South Africa
Next entry:
The Clip You've Heard About
Last Sunday, I did something for the very first time.
No, stop thinking all those mean ideas. What I did was perform a wedding ceremony. I was the officiant at the wedding of my good friends Jae and Karin.
You see, about seven years ago, I wrote to the Universal Life Church and was officially decreed a “Shaman”—a minister with a special title, according to their religion. And the good folks at the registrar’s office in Los Angeles County (or any other government office in the U.S. for that matter) aren’t in the business of deciding which religions are serious and which are too odd to be allowed to marry people, thank goodness.
I did this really before anyone was online, other than me and my geeky pals. The church wasn’t—I don’t remember how I heard about them, but I do remember putting a five dollar bill in the envelope, and worrying if some money-sniffing dog in the mail room would end up with my hard earned green.
So, being a minister, I can perform wedding ceremonies. I presume I can also do funerals, as long as I don’t try to burn the bodies in a pyre and pollute the air or some other grievous crime. And I can’t do baptisms, because who wants to be baptized by the universal life church? ‘Course, if you’re interested, I could probably arrange something.
The ceremony went well, I kept it short and to the point—and even dissuaded Jae that his suggestion to do a Cat in the Hat ceremony would probably not fly so well. ("I will love you poor or rich, I will love you whine or bitch, I’m your husband, truly, ma’am, I’m your husband, Jae I am...")
The actual ceremony went something like this:
Ladies and gentlemen, friends and family of Jae and Karin, thank you for coming today.
Many weeks ago, we all received in the mail a fancy envelope that contained an invitation to this wedding. All of you chose to attend. Some of you live close to this beautiful peaceful golf course, and others have come across oceans to be here.
No matter the distance we all came today, Jae and Karin and all of us, to make a promise. That promise is a marriage vow, and we will all be bound together by it.
Jae and Karin are joining together today as one couple, and we are not simply witnesses—we are here to show our support and pledge our assistance to ensure the success of this marriage.
I am honored to be performing this ceremony, because I have known Jae and Karin for many years.
I have been there for some good memories, like a summer evening spent with a group of friends in a quiet cabin, playing cards and telling stories. I’ve also seen them in some times that we perhaps not so good. I remember one day they moved out of their apartment. The elevator was broken and they moved couches, tables, and a refrigerator down a long and twisting flight of stairs.
So I can say I’ve seen some of the best moment, and some of the worst moments, and what has always remained clear about their relationship is the respect and the tolerance they have for one another.
Jae and Karin, that respect, more than anything else, will carry you through future bad moments to all the good moments I know you will share.
Now, marriage is not a commitment to be entered into lightly, or without careful consideration or with hasty decisions.
However, I believe that neither of you, nor anyone present here today, has any doubt that yours will be a long and happy union.
I’d like to lead you now in your vows.
Jae, before these witnesses, will you have this woman to be your wedded wife, to live together in marriage? Do you pledge to be true to her, to respect her, and to grow with her through the years? Will you love her, comfort her, in sickness and in health, in sorrow and in joy, so long as you both shall live?
(I will)
Karin, before these witnesses, will you have this man to be your wedded husband, to live together in marriage? Do you pledge to be true to him, to respect him, and to grow with him through the years? Will you love him, comfort him, in sickness and in health, in sorrow and in joy, so long as you both shall live?
(I will)
Jae, please repeat after me:
I, Jae, take you, Karin, to be my wife/ I will cherish our friendship/ and love you today, tomorrow and forever/ I will trust you and honor you/ I will love you faithfully/ through the best and the worst./ Come what may I will always be there/ I come into this union letting go of my deepest fears/ and if I doubt I will remember this time/ and why we came together this day/ As I have given you my hands to hold/ so I give you my life to keep.
Karin, please repeat after me:
I, Karin, take you, Jae, to be my husband/ I will cherish our friendship/ and love you today, tomorrow and forever/ I will trust you and honor you/ I will love you faithfully/ through the best and the worst./ Come what may, I will always be there/ I come into this union letting go of my deepest fears/ and if I doubt I will remember this time/ and why we came together this day/ As I have given you my hands to hold/ so I give you my life to keep.
Jeff and Syl, may I have the rings?
We’ve talked about marriage. So what of love?
Love is the source, love is the heat, the furnace, the forge, from which the bonds of marriage are created.
Jae, Karin, these rings are more than shiny objects. As you wear them each day for the rest of your lives, I hope they remind you of two things.
First, of love. Of the warmth, of the light, of the spark, that brought you together many years ago at Occidental.
Second, I hope they remind you of marriage. Of the labor, the care, the time and the effort that is takes to pour and mold and shape love into a lasting, beautiful relationship.
Your vows are your promise. These rings will be your ever present reminders.
Jae, would you please place this ring on Karin’s finger and repeat after me:
With this ring, I marry you.
Karin, would you please place this ring on Jae’s finger and repeat after me:
With this ring, I marry you.
With the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife.
You may now kiss the bride.
(They kissed.)
Ladies and gentlemen, I am pleased to present to you for the first time, the newest newlyweds in the world, Mr. and Mrs. Sung.
After that, it was pretty much all like a regular wedding, with the exception of me signing the wedding certificate—I even put “Shaman” in the “official title” box (well, it is!)
