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Things That Go ‘Beep’ in the Night

posted at 9:44 am
on May. 23, 2013

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Last night, at 3 a.m., my car alarm went off.

...For about 30 seconds. Then it turned off.  And all was silent again, except for my heart pounding as my dream state mixed with the real world to form some sort of beeping-dragon-threat-thing.

About 5 minutes later… just as I hit fully asleep… it went off again.

... For about 1 minute. Then it turned off.  Ah, so they didn’t steal it the first time, I thought.  Sigh.

I didn’t see the car flashing and beeping, mind you, just heard it as I lay in bed, 20% awake. But my car is old and last Sunday it spontaneously went off in the parking lot of the winery Sarah and I went to—she’s part of a wine club, ya see. So I figured it was just an electrical short in the trunk or something—it was kinda raining out, and I prepared to doze off again.

But when it went off a third time, I decided action needed to be taken. I stumbled out of bed to do something about it, so I wouldn’t be THAT asshole neighbour who lets his car alarm go off all night.

I pull on pants and a shirt, and teeter downstairs and outside without putting on shoes.  I don’t know why I didn’t put on shoes, did I mention it was raining? Clear thinking was not happening at this point.

I get to my car, unlock it, and leave it unlocked so the alarm won’t arm, then stagger and weave and step gingerly all at once back to my house, drag myself upstairs, strip off, fall into bed and consider my good deed good enough to counteract the bad deed of waking everyone up in the first place.

About 10 minutes later… the car alarm goes off AGAIN.

Only this time, I open my window wide and lean my body WAY out so I can look along the house, down the street, and see…

...that’s it’s not my car that’s going off, it’s the SUV across the street from it, with the same car alarm.

AAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHH!



 
 

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