Travis Smith: my resume, bio and photosback to the main blog page

“Cheney Backs Gay Marriage / But only for those making over $200,000 a year.”

posted at 1:04 am
on Aug. 30, 2004

who said it?

“Military survey says soldiers suffer high rate of stress”

posted at 6:08 pm
on Aug. 29, 2004

who said it?

“Taco Bell is named after its founder, Glen Bell. The first Taco Bell opened in Downey, California (a suburb of Los Angeles) in 1962, but Glen Bell had been involved with fast food for many years previously.”

posted at 1:40 pm
on Aug. 28, 2004

who said it?

“God wants spiritual fruits, not religious nuts”

posted at 12:11 am
on Aug. 28, 2004

who said it?

“Talk Show Host Kicked in the Head”

posted at 12:29 pm
on Aug. 26, 2004

who said it?

“Grand Opening!”

posted at 2:56 am
on Aug. 25, 2004

who said it?

“If you have integrity, nothing else matters.  If you don’t have integrity, nothing else matters.”

posted at 9:17 pm
on Aug. 23, 2004

who said it?

“It would never come into [the broad masses’] heads to fabricate colossal untruths, and they would not believe that others could have the impudence to distort the truth so infamously. Even though the facts which prove this to be so may be brought clearly to their minds, they will still doubt and waver and will continue to think that there may be some other explanation.”

posted at 11:54 am
on Aug. 22, 2004

who said it?

“Well, why don’t they say it’s 17 dollars and 299 cents? That sounds even cheaper!”

posted at 12:21 am
on Aug. 22, 2004

who said it?

“How surprised I therefore was, when I discovered to my considerable dissatisfaction and disappointment what a useless shower of bastards you truly are.”

posted at 2:15 am
on Aug. 21, 2004

who said it?

“Bad week for airport security, as a Brussels Airlines flight to Vienna was aborted because a passenger?s cat got out of its traveling bag, ran into the cockpit, and attacked the co-pilot.”

posted at 12:48 pm
on Aug. 20, 2004

who said it?

“You have terrible disease X because:”
JUDAISM: God hates you.
CHRISTIANITY: God loves you.
ISLAM: Such is fate.”

posted at 6:12 pm
on Aug. 19, 2004

who said it?

“Oh. It’s you.”

posted at 11:54 am
on Aug. 19, 2004

who said it?

“Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy.”

posted at 1:50 pm
on Aug. 18, 2004

who said it?

“Obviate malfunction.”

posted at 1:02 am
on Aug. 18, 2004

who said it?

“British Columbians tune in to country music less than anyone else in Canada (except for Quebecers).”

posted at 6:39 pm
on Aug. 17, 2004

who said it?

“Monthly, health insurance for us combined will cost $73.47 in British Columbia.”

posted at 6:37 pm
on Aug. 17, 2004

who said it?

“I used to work on a help desk for a major oil company. One day a drilling engineer called me up, incensed about a “bug” in Microsoft Word. Seems he had written up a long report about his last six months of work, which was inspecting the “boreholes” in northern Alberta. The last thing he did before sending it to his boss was fire up the spell-checker and press “Accept all”. Naturally, the word “boreholes” was not in the Microsoft dictionary, so he sent his boss a huge report on how he’d spent the last six months inspecting the “brothels” of northern Alberta.”

posted at 12:38 pm
on Aug. 17, 2004

who said it?

“I had looked for such objects [new moons around Saturn] for weeks while at my office in Paris, but it was only once on holiday, using my laptop, that my code eventually detected them. This tells me I should take more holidays.”

posted at 4:36 pm
on Aug. 16, 2004

who said it?

“Vancouver’s opening ceremonies are 2,010 days away.”

posted at 12:05 pm
on Aug. 16, 2004

who said it?

“But then, I probably shouldn’t have driven home for Thanksgiving while high on crack. Hindsight, as always, is 20/20.”

posted at 12:56 am
on Aug. 16, 2004

who said it?

“Why does sex sell?” “[Laughs] Because it’s so very rarely free.”

posted at 11:11 pm
on Aug. 15, 2004

who said it?

“Due to International Olympic Committee (IOC) restrictions regarding the online transmission of Olympic Games coverage, CBC.ca is prohibited from streaming any live or on-demand audio/video files that may include protected Olympic material. Between August 13 - 29, CBC.ca will not offer live radio streaming. All on-demand TV newscasts will be unavailable. Special editions of some CBC Radio newscasts will be available throughout this period. CBC.ca will resume full streaming services on August 30th. We apologize for any inconvenience and appreciate your patience while the Olympic Internet broadcast restriction is in progress.”

posted at 1:14 pm
on Aug. 15, 2004

who said it?

“I am a musical robot.”

posted at 11:18 pm
on Aug. 14, 2004

who said it?

“It’s like stew in a pie crust, and I just can’t do that.”

posted at 5:47 pm
on Aug. 12, 2004

who said it?

“Yes, we’re extremely pleased with our room in every way, except perhaps we were wondering if you could possibly send a housecleaner up to replace the sheets which look just a bit like they haven’t been changed since someone slept in them last night. You could? Oh, that would be great.”

posted at 11:04 am
on Aug. 11, 2004

who said it?

“I grew up on the prairies of Saskatchewan. My Dad bought me a dog.  I loved that dog.  But it ran away. We watched it go for days.”

posted at 10:57 am
on Aug. 11, 2004

who said it?

“My separation was almost too equitable. She took half my Jenga blocks. I can now only play with three-year-olds.”

posted at 10:41 am
on Aug. 11, 2004

who said it?

“Lumberjacks.”

posted at 10:39 am
on Aug. 11, 2004

who said it?

“Theory: The reason that faded, worn-looking clothes are in right now is the same reason that palor was in in the 18th century—clothing has become very cheap and of high quality, so if you can look like your clothes are ‘worn,’ you stand out.”

posted at 11:54 am
on Aug. 6, 2004

who said it?

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